Transform Your Life with Genna Thomsen
Mental Health Resources and App's
988 – National Mental Health Hotline – Talk or Text 24/7
National Alliance on Mental Illness – NAMI www.mani.org/Home
https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/988
Crisis Hotlines: Common Hotline Phone Numbers | Eluna Network
Mental Health App’s
Talkspace – Best Overall Therapy App
Calm – Best Mindfulness App
My3 – Three People / Three Distractions / Safety Plan App
Chopra App – Great mindfulness and free meditations
Pride Counseling – Best Queer Mental Health App
Youper – Best Self-Guided Therapy App
Headspace – Best Anxiety App
Bereaved Mother’s Retreat’s
Bereaved Mother’s Retreat’s sponsored by Cristie North of Taylor Hagen Memorial Foundation and Leigh Anne Garcia of Andrew Garcia Memorial Foundation.
2025 Dates:
Twilight Moon Ranch, Kamas
April 4th - 7th 2025
May 16th - 18th 2025
September 26 - 28th 2025
Visit www.thmemorialfoundation.org or email cristie@thmemorialfoundation.org
RENEWAL & JUST BRING YOURSELF
“It’s never too late to become who you want to be. I hope you live a life that you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over.”
– F. Scott Fitzgerald
RENEWAL
“We don’t even know how strong we are until we are forced to bring that hidden strength forward. In times of tragedy, of war, of necessity, people do amazing things. The human capacity for survival and renewal is awesome.”
- Isabel Allende
This month we have moments where nature is awakening, breaking free from the slumber of winter. Trees are getting their buds and blossoms. The earth reminds us its time to renew, new growth, new awakenings, a new season in our lives.
I love the reminders and lessons in nature. What is it in your life right now that is worth celebrating? What is going so well, it fills you with joy and excitement? Or what is weighing your heart down, making you sad or mad? Both those states of emotion are great places to reflect and renew from.
We want more good if we already have some of it in our lives, work, family, finances, or relationships. What actions are needed to maintain or grow the good? What small things, a few minutes or more a day, could make a difference? Would expressing gratitude create more good? Would saving money by eating out less make a difference? Would complaining less? What actions could you add or remove to have MORE good things in your day-to-day routine?
If we are in a place of struggle what edits are needed? What do we need to let go of, or outsource to another for relief? What can we forgive in ourselves or another to impact the situation? Where do we need to set boundaries even if it feels difficult?
These things can help us renew our peace of mind, strength our personal respect for ourselves by cultivating more love and satisfaction for life as it is.
I invite you to begin a quest of renewal in your life this month. Make some edits, plant seeds of change. Let’s see what we can grow with a little effort and attention to MORE good things.
JUST BRING YOURSELF
Every third Saturday I have a gathering at my house with a group of women. Over the holidays I changed the day as it was super close to Christmas. One of these women said she ALWAYS kept the third Saturday open to never miss this time together. My switch made her unable to come and that was a disappointment to her.
Last month I moved into a new house. We slept in our new home for the first night, the Friday before the third Saturday! I knew from my previous experience that I was not willing to upset the dates on this saved time. I have disappointed people in my life. I will not do it willing or knowingly. So, I hosted as usual in my less than 24 hours occupied home!
I was feeling super emotional about my late son Joey not ever seeing our new home. He would have loved it. He would have been here to help us move, help us get settled, tell me where he thought my rocks and crystals should go. He could have helped his dad in the yard or climbed in the loft of the big shed. So many things made my heart ache for him to be here. I cried for what could have been, for the loss that still exists with him being gone. He SHOULD be here. No matter how much time has passed (7 ½ years) I still want him back. My heart always wants him back. My grief and longing are the shadow of the love unspent for him.
So, when my friends ask me what they can bring each month I usually say, “Just bring yourself.” Recently I found a poem titled this by Becky Hemsley that so beautifully captures how I feel about anyone who comes to my home. It is part of a new collection of hers called ‘Words to Remember’.
“When I invite you over you always ask, “What should I bring” and I always say “just bring yourself”
But what I really mean is…
Bring your woes and your worries. Let us talk them out if you want to.
Bring your sadness and your sorrows and let me hold you whilst you cry, if you need to.
Bring your heaviness and heartache and let me lighten your load a little if I am able to.
Bring your achievements and accomplishments and let me celebrate your successes with you.
Bring your happiness and hope and let me share your joy and listen to your dreams.
Bring your flaws and your failures and let me accept you regardless.
Yes, when I say, ‘just bring yourself”, what I really mean is that I want you to feel so comfortably yourself with me that you can bring your smiles and frowns, laughter and tears, joy, and grief, highs and lows.
So just bring yourself, your whole self. And be yourself.
Because your whole self is welcome here.” - Becky Hemsley
Mental Health Moment:
“Every blade in the field, every leaf in the forest, lays down its life in its season as beautifully as it was taken up.”
- Henry David Thoreau
This month I invite you to plant something physically or metaphorically.
Put something in the earth, in a pot, or plant a seed of change in your mind or heart.
Give it real water and sunlight. Or give it the light and attention it needs to grow and flourish so you can ‘see’ the growth of the change you have planted.
Tell someone, set a thirty-day goal for your mental or emotional growth if you are planting metaphorically. Check in with someone, let them be your partner in this discovery!
If you are planting real plants, take a before picture so at the beginning of fall you can look back at what you grew!
All my best,
Genna
QUIET STRENGTH
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
– LAO TZU
QUIET STRENGTH
“Never assume that loud is strong and quiet is weak.”
- Unknown
Happy March!
Let us start the month with an Irish blessing. “May your troubles be less and your blessing be more, and nothing but happiness come through your door.” I also like, “May the wind always be on your back.” And “May the road rise to meet you”. I invite you to google some, there are many great ones out there and it does a mind good to read well wishes any time of the year.
March is beautiful and hints at warmer times to come. Then it’s freezing cold, dark and a bit dreary making me wonder if winter will ever lose its grip. It is a confusing time when I am not sure if I want to come out of hibernation, work in the yard, go for a walk outside or just stay in where it’s warm with a stable climate.
Ernest Hemingway once said: "In our darkest moments, we don't need solutions or advice. What we yearn for is simply human connection — a quiet presence, a gentle touch. Life can feel overwhelming, and sometimes the best gift we can offer is our presence—not to fix, not to solve, but simply to be there.”
Connection is our gift in time of need, in time of turmoil, in times of upset, sadness, or despair. I have often called myself a hard-wired helper. I like to serve, give, ease others plot, make light things that are heavy. As the years have passed and I have gone through experiences of great mental, emotional and physical pain I learned what brought me the most comfort during some of those most trying times, knowing someone was with me. Knowing someone was there, a lot of someone’s usually!
Quiet strength can be found in silence, ours and that of others. Sitting next to someone in stillness is a gift. My mom has Alzheimer’s & dementia. As this disease takes more and more of her mind, she has become increasingly non-verbal. So often we sit in silence together. It was a restless silence at first. I used to feel like it needed to be filled with questions, out loud or in my mind, then music. Recently she and I sat in chairs on the patio on a rare sunny March afternoon with the sun on our faces in complete silence albeit the birds returning to usher in Spring. It was beautiful, it was peaceful. I found renewed strength there.
This month I invite you to make time for quiet. Create some space in your mind, heart and soul to be still. Breathe deeply, let thoughts float away like clouds, breathing through anything that lingers until all that remains is stillness.
Mental Health Moment:
Take 10 minutes for “A place of Stillness guided Meditation”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BbCZ131Zw8o
All my best,
Genna
Love & The Escalator of Pain
“Feelings are much like waves, we can’t stop them from coming but we can choose which ones to surf.”
– Jonathan Martensson
LOVE & THE ESCALATOR OF PAIN
“Flowers grow back even after the harshest winters. You will, too.”
- Jennae Cecelia
Happy February. I love a month with a day to share extra love. Sometimes to fully feel love we have to acknowledge the emotional pain we are feeling. It is a brave and honest thing to be real about where you are, how you feel, and heal the parts of you that need healed. I commend all of you who are doing the work.
Have you lost someone who you loved deeply? Who you thought you couldn’t make it a day without? Have you had to say goodbye to someone who you could not imagine any of your tomorrows without? Have you laid to rest someone who was part of your life for so long you are not sure who you are without them?
If your answer is yes to any of the questions above, you have ridden the escalator of pain. Maybe you are on it right now. No matter if the loss was sudden and unexpected or long and known. The loss of those we care so deeply for causes a pain that is deep and real. We land on an escalator that is moving, dragging us day by day with this new unwelcome guest called the pain of loss. It’s a guest that doesn’t leave, has no personal boundaries and no matter how we might try to hide, fade or fix the pain it still waits. It is uninvited and unwanted yet real and not imagined. Depending upon the type of loss it can carry extra weight.
Losing my son to suicide added a mental pain to the ever-present emotional pain of his death. I couldn’t imagine what would make him not want to make it to his tomorrow’s. I had to put myself on trial. Look at everything I did or didn’t do and ask myself if I could or should have known he was suicidal. Once I could say no to that I started a new trail to see if anything I did, didn’t do, said, left un-said could have in anyway lead to his choice to not being here. That is a brutal painful thing in the middle of the most painful loss of my life. I was judge and jury. It added mental anguish and turmoil that would not cease for months. I wanted it to make sense, and I just couldn’t make it make sense.
My mind was spinning. I didn’t find myself guilty of anything that would have lead to his wanting to leave. I wish this verdict brought comfort, it didn’t as he was still gone.
With any loss. No matter what you know or understand, the person you loved is still gone. That hurts. The escalator of pain moves you on it. I learned that if I wanted to get free of this ever-moving path it was going to take effort, intention, mindful steps and clarify of choice in who I wanted to be without him.
So, I asked myself, how did I want to honor his life? How could I give and show my love for him without him here to give that love too? Where could I serve in his name? Who would I be without him? I used these questions to guide me off the escalator of pain. I am clear if I didn’t, I could still be riding it. The pain of loss is real. Shutting down, turning to substances, anger, withdrawing, those are understandable things. Someone could easily do any or all these things and someone could say, “They lost their _____ (spouse, family, child, parent). Whoever it is and it would be understood why they got stuck on the pathway of their pain.
This month has a holiday dedicated to love. I know many focus on the romantic love aspect. I have always liked Valentines to celebrate loving others just to share love! So how can you show love this month for the one you lost? What did they love? My Joey loved pizza, when we go out to eat we give his name. It’s a small silly way we bring him with us as he loved food!
Use love this month to guide you from pain to a purpose that honors love. From a Martina McBride song, “Love is the only house big enough for all the pain in the world.”
Self-Care Tip:
“Nurture yourself like you would anybody else going through something this hard.”
- Unknown
SELF LOVE
This month I invite you to love yourself a little MORE!
What does that look like?
I am not sure what makes you happy? Do MORE of that?
What relaxes you? Make one hour MORE for that!
What makes you laugh? Do a little MORE of that.
Who do you feel the most calm and free around? Spend a little MORE time with them!
I invite you to set aside at least one hour this month (yes MORE is great) just for YOU!
Love on you, buy yourself flowers if they make you smile, light candles when you eat dinner, do the things that make your heart a little lighter!
All my best,
Genna
Connection
“January is the quietest month in the garden. But just because it looks quiet doesn’t mean that nothing is happening.”
– Rosalie Muller Wright
CONNECTION
“Connection is the energy that is created between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued- when they can give and receive without judgement.”
- Brene Brown, PhD, LMSW
Happy New Year!
As we stand at the start of a brand-new year this can be with mixed emotions. Some begin a year bright eyed and ready for the promise of all that can be. Others have a heavy heart beginning a new time and space where a loved one will never join in what’s to come.
Wherever you find yourself give it room. Breathe deeply into where you are, feel all there is to feel and allow what is real for you to have room to be felt, seen, or heard. I know in my own life and grief journeys that is what matters most, room! Room to allow ourselves the space to be whatever we need to be. Happy, mad, silly or sad. It all needs its own room. There is space for all of it if we allow it. Some emotions are easier to flow with and through. Other emotions we choke back, fight off, try to hide or push down. The older I get the sillier that seems to me. I want to FEEL IT ALL. So now I lean unapologetically into anything I feel at ANYTIME. Does this make people uncomfortable. YES, IT DOES.
So, what. Let them be uncomfortable. It will also make them laugh. Tears come easily for me. Happy tears, sad tears, tears of empathy, tears of shared pain. A good Kleenex commercial tears. You name it, they can come pouring out of me. This makes my family laugh a lot. “Is mom crying again?” is often heard when we are together! My answer is, “Yes, yes I am”. I feel a lot and I feel deeply. This is often reflected in waterworks from my eyes!
My last round of public tears was at the Broncos vs. Chiefs game last weekend. When the military helicopters flew over the stadium, I could see the soldiers in the back of the aircrafts waving and tears started to flow. I felt so moved by this. I felt so honored and proud to live in a nation where people gladly and willingly serve to protect us and our freedoms. As a mother who has lost a child I know the price of a life. It is SO precious. So, I stood there with seventy thousand strangers and let the tears pour down my face in a moment of tender appreciation for all that has been laid at the alter of our freedom in this great nation.
I only knew three people in that entire stadium, but I felt a connection. I feel it in large crowds when we all put our hands over our hearts and pay respects to our flag. You can feel a common thread of honor and respect like a current in these moments. When my husband used to have a motorcycle, I loved how when passing other bikers on the highway they would most often wave when passing. It was a connection of sorts. We didn’t know each other. Often came from different walks of life. Yet when out on the open road we all belonged to one club of kindred spirits.
Connections like this can be found anywhere if you look for them. We have connections in our neighborhoods, the places we frequent like a local coffee shop, restaurant or grocery store. My husband and I have favorite servers at places we eat who have become good friends over the years.
We can form great connections at work, church, the gym and other places where we enjoy spending our time. Knowing others and being known is a gift in life. My grandma used to say one of the deepest punishments in prison is solidary confinement. That is the ultimate removable of connections. We need them. They nurture us, support us, help us be more of who we can be.
I invite you at the start of this year to do a connection inventory. What connections do you have? Which ones would you like to add for 2025? What steps are needed to do that? What connections are taking and not giving? What needs to happen to edit or release those?
Make this year meaningful in the time you spend with those you love. Time is the real gift!
Self-Care Tip:
“Human connections are deeply nurtured in the field of shared story.”
- Jean Houston
REACH OUT
This month I invite you to intentionally reach out to others. Do this in small ways daily by staying off your phone when in line at a store/ coffee shop / restaurant/ etc. Make eye contact with the cashier/ server. Thank them by name.
Look someone in the eye in a hallway or while walking on a sidewalk and smile.
Do not wear headphones on a walk or during one trip to the gym this month. LISTEN! Be present to what is happening around you and who is there. Make up complimentary stories about everyone you see. Create stories in your mind about them winning at life! Have everyone your eyes touch be on their way to happy, healthy and wealthy outcomes just because you looked at them! YES, play make believe! We did this ALL the time when we were kids! Try it now as an adult.
Text someone you haven’t talked to in a while. Tell them they were on your mind and compliment them for something awesome they do or give to the world.
All my best,
Genna
Seeking Light In The Dark
"I heard a bird sing in the dark of December
A magical thing and sweet to remember.”
– Oliver Herford
SEEKING LIGHT IN THE DARK
“Even the day’s last sliver of light must submit to the darkness.
But it also holds the fierce will of the sun to rise once more.”
- Angie Weiland-Crosby
Happy December!
It is dark now and this can feel heavy physically and emotionally for many. The holidays are not always merry and bright. It often opens or reignites a deep ache and remembrance for those who are NOT here with us. It can stir old feelings or loss or leave fresh wounds open wishing you could see, be with, or shop for the loved one who is gone.
Something I love about this time of year is that there are more chances to serve. When my son Joey died in September the holidays came way to fast. We didn’t know what to do or how to navigate this first season without him. He was fifteen, still a child living at home. Someone we got Christmas PJ’s for, put out a stocking, all the things. I decided to ask family and friends to write a memory or share a story about him and give it to us for Christmas that first year. We put them in his stocking.
We loved reading them all Christmas morning, during the time he would have spent opening his gifts. We got to know more about him, hear new memories of time he spent with others. It was in its own way a soothing balm to our raw aching hearts. I have met other families who do trees with ornaments in their child’s name, collect socks, set a place for them at the holiday meal, and some who leave town going somewhere warm as a big screw you to celebrating at all.
There is no right or wrong way in grief, life, or processing love for those who we have lost. Please find something that feels right for you. Be gentle, go slower. Say no if something feels forced or unnecessary. On the other side of that be with people. Let yourself be loved and cared for. Connections matter. Community matters. Allow those things into your experiences on your terms in ways that lift you up and make you feel good.
I know for sure even the biggest storms lose their steam at some point. Even through the darkest times we will see light again. We may have to seek that light or stillness after a storm for our minds and hearts. Take the steps to release what is no longer serving you, let go of old thoughts or patterns that are keeping you stuck. Processing pain and grief are not the same as being stuck in them. Get professional help if and when needed. The national 988 number is a lifetime in times of struggle not just if suicidal. If you feel overwhelmed and need someone to talk to ‘right now’ call or text that number. It’s the reason it was created.
My wish for you is to allow light to pierce your mind and heart. To feel its warmth even briefly on the coldest of days. Invite love to fill you up from the inside out. In moments of uncertainty ask yourself what would love do, or what would kindness do? Make a choice from that place.
Wishing you a holiday season that feeds your heart and soul.
Self-Care Tip:
“The great benefit of slowing down is reclaiming the time and tranquility to make meaningful connections — with people, with culture, with work, with nature, with our own bodies and minds.”
-Carl Honore
SLOW DOWN
This month I challenge you to take 12 minutes (yes because it’s December!) each day to be still. Sit in stillness for 12 minutes each day.
You can play music if the thought of sitting still AND quiet just seems like too much! Breathe deeply, allow any thoughts to float like clouds across your mind not engaging in them.
Deep breaths. Purposeful quietness. Taking these few minutes in mindful connection to your breath, your body, to being here now.
“Pause
S..L..O..W it all down. Pause from your full calendar and long task list. Take a moment – or ten – to simply be. To remind yourself that this is life, right here and right now. To reacquaint yourself with your pulsing heart and incredible body that allows you to do all that you do. To remember that life is precious and fragile and should be lived in love. To remind yourself that whatever is happening or wherever you find yourself in your journey, it is all as it is supposed to be.”
- Nikki Banas
All my best,
Genna
Transition
“November is a time of transition, of slowing down, of turning inward.”
– Elizabeth J. Kolodziej
TRANSITION
“Not everything that comes back to you is meant for you.
Sometimes things come back as a reminder of just how good you are without them”
- Billy Chapata
As we watch mother nature transition from summer to fall it makes me reflect on internal transitions. If you live in Utah, it can be cold and chilly in the morning prompting seat warmers, jackets and heaters. Late afternoon can have you with windows down and the A/C back on. We can make many transitions to our external environment in the span of a short amount of time.
What about inside of you? Can you transition from anger to mild irritation quickly? Do you move from strong emotions of desire to faint interest in a flash of an eye? It seems to me when it comes to emotions we are not as fluid as we are with external things like adjusting the temperature of our surrounding. I have often read the quote on how the trees are showing us how easy it is to let go when they lose their leaves. What about the brilliant show of color before they let go? Are we our brightest and most vibrant before we release something we have held onto? Do you let go with ease or does the process of letting go feel difficult to you?
I love the lessons in nature. Take a deep breath. Then take another. What is something you want that isn’t currently happening or showing up in your life? What could you let go of in your mind or heart to allow it to come to you? To take an action what steps are needed for you to transition from where you are now to where you want to be?
I am committed to peace in my life. I had some frustrations bubbling up inside me towards a family member, they were festering, and I wanted to let them go. I also felt ‘justified’ in my anger. I felt right about the things the other person did that I felt were wrong. I am committed to peaceful living, to choosing happiness over being right and asking myself what would love do?
Well, in my head peace and love and trying not to be right swear a lot! So, I often need to take a step back, breathe deeply and regroup BEFORE I speak or act. Sometimes easier said than done. In this case I needed to get these thoughts and feelings from the inside of me to the outside. On the last full moon, I wrote a note in pencil (lead is connected to the earth) expressing everything that was inside of me. It didn’t feel productive to have this conversation with the person I felt was wrong. In some situations, you can. In this case I knew it would go in circles causing more upset. I went outside after dark and burned the letter in a jar. Letting all of it go. Now when my mind wants to jump back into the upset, I remind it we burned it!
Sometimes we need an action to help transition things from the inside of us to the outside. It’s good to know that we don’t have to hold onto upset, that things that hurt us in the past do not need to keep hurting us now. We don’t have to let old pains back in or let people (even family) be in our lives if their choices cause us harm or pain. Good clear boundaries are needed even if they feel hard in the beginning. If peace is your goal, then stand your ground and choose that for yourself in all areas of your life.
Little things like cleaning your freezer or a kitchen drawer while saying, “I am getting rid of the old making room for the new” can help move energy and help get us from one place to the next.
The upcoming holidays can be tiring and hard on a weary or grieving heart. Be gentle with you. Say no if you don’t want to do something. No means no for any reason without explanation, remember that its ok to not be ok. It’s alright to feel raw and exposed. It’s acceptable to let things be uncomfortable while you are learning a new normal without the person you lost.
I invite you to ask yourself the question, “How do I want to include ______ (whoever has passed) in these holidays?” Then do that! Some people set a place for them at the dinner table. Some share stories, write letters to be read in private. Some do coat or sock drives in their loved one’s name. You do what feels best for you. Honor your love for them through your loss.
Self-Care Tip:
“Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow.”
-Alice Mackenzie Swaim
BOUNDARIES – www.helpguide.org
“Time boundaries allow you to focus on your priorities at work and in your personal life without feeling crowded by other people’s needs and wants. Imagine that you’ve had a stressful work week and want to spend the weekend recuperating. You might decline a party invite or set a limit on how long you’ll be there. Other time-related restrictions could include asking a friend to avoid calling you during work hours or asking a partner to delay an important conversation until a more convenient time.
Shifting boundaries
Boundaries aren’t etched in stone. You’ll need to adjust them as circumstances change and relationships grow. This can be especially true in long-term relationships. Communication is important as you reevaluate and revise your boundaries. You want the other person to be clear on the change and the reason behind it."
Take care of you. Say yes when you want to and remember that no is a complete sentence!
All my best,
Genna
Emotion - Making or breaking you?
“Meet me in the middle of your story when the soul is worn but wise.”
-Angie Weilland-Crosby
Emotions are such powerful things in our lives. At times they feel like they are making or breaking us. I love the concept of emotional intelligence. As I am not raising children anymore and do not have the highs and lows of that experience, I am leaning more and more into how my emotions impact me, my mood, and interactions with others. I find myself asking more questions in my head and heart on why certain things are bothering me. I am in a new time of discovery of things I find pleasing. It’s a wonderful space to be in. I invite you to join creating your own journey of emotional balance in life!
Deepak Chopra has some thoughts and tips on Emotional Intelligence that are so powerful, read below.
“The key is to cultivate emotional intelligence. The term might go in and out of fashion, but the value of emotional intelligence never changes, and when you focus on it, you will achieve something worthwhile for life. Here are six principles to guide you through the process.
Commit to never complaining, criticizing, or playing the victim.
Imagine a creative, positive future for yourself.
Don’t regret the past. It no longer exists.
Be present in every situation as it occurs.
Be independent of other people’s criticism or approval.
Be responsive to feedback.
It is fair to say that hardly anyone hits upon these principles by trial and error or through experience of life. A person can live a long time without paying attention to emotional intelligence, and among men, the word “emotion” too often connotes something undesirable, as if showing emotional sensitivity is a sign of weakness.
But emotional intelligence is gender neutral. The fact that humans can observe their emotions is a remarkable trait, and once you begin to observe your own emotions, you can counter the power of an unwanted emotion like fear and anxiety. Whether we admit it or not, emotions fascinate us, as Hollywood well knows. Empathizing with emotions onscreen is easy and pleasurable, but we are too attached to our own emotions, and it takes very little experience of anxiety, humiliation, rejection, and failure to train us to avoid the mine field of emotions in general.
So, it’s worth saying that developing emotional intelligence isn’t scary or difficult. All you need to do is notice and pay attention. By pausing and standing back a little, you can observe how you are reacting at any given moment.”
May you find new and ever improved ways of feeling and sharing what you feel with those you trust the most!
"Calmness is the cradle of power"
-Josiah Gilbert Holland
All my best!
Genna
Peace as a pathway
“Peace is not something you wish for. It is something you make, something you are, something you do, and something you give away.”
- Robert Fulghum
In life there are so many things coming at us that require our time, energy, attention and focus. We have our primary relationships with a spouse, children, their spouses if you have adult children. Then if you are caregiving there is the time and effort mental, emotional, physical and often financial of taking care of an aging parent or grandparent. This comes with a new and different set of challenges, gifts and navigational things to make your way through. Add extended family, work, clients, friends, community events, religious gatherings, politics to think about and spend energy on and it’s no wonder we get so overloaded.
Stress is a real issue when it continues day after day unmanaged. It can lead to mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and even personality disorders. Chronic stress can lead people into unhealthy habits of overindulging in food, alcohol or other substance best left to moderation. I typed stress into google as you know there are always those drop downs with helpful tips. One of them had the title, “How to Relieve Stress Quickly” this is what it said.
1. Get active. Almost any form of physical activity can act as a stress reliever. (I love a walk)
2. Eat a healthy diet (Dark chocolate & bacon are healthy right?)
3. Avoid Unhealthy habits (Well really…. So, overindulgence is out I guess...)
4. Meditate (I have the Deepak Chopra app and do one of the guided ones per day… when I take an Epsom salt bath, I do a 29-minute Chakra singing bowls one that is on You Tube, it’s amazing!)
5. Laugh more! (YES, do this! My husband follows cat videos and is always laughing.)
6. Connect with others (Together is my favorite place to be!)
7. Assert yourself (Love this, might make you introvert a little twitchy. You can tell someone off in your mind or in a letter. I wrote a couple letters the last full moon and burnt them in a jar in my back yard! It is cleansing and stress relieving!)
8. Try yoga. (Good tip, I love how deep I breath when I do yoga, that might be the most relaxing part as I have fallen on my head trying some of the poses. That sparked some deep laughter in me, not so much in others who felt way more serious about the yoga poses than I did apparently!)
To find or create a pathway to peace in your life you want to find little things you can do every day to help keep you in balance. We often think we need some large measures; a long retreat or vacation get away to reset us. If we take ten to fifteen minutes everyday to devote to peace in our minds and bodies, we will feel a huge shift from the inside out.
Make time to be still in your life. We have so much going on around us. We have so much technology connecting us to everything and everyone. TURN IT ALL OFF. Take a few deep breaths. Find that place inside you where stillness exists. Breathe a few more times into that scared space where you are centered and balanced at all times in all places no matter the chaos that surrounds you. Do this in the early morning light with your feet on the earth if you can, it is so powerful to connect to the earth through your feet. Breathe in the energy of the planet. Let the strength on the sun calm you and warm you. If you can’t be outside to do this, you can create this in your mind. Visualize yourself at the beach, in the mountains, beside your favorite lake or stream. Be where you feel alive and at home. Breathe peace into your mind and heart from this place.
I promise if you make time for this daily you will walk a new pathway with renewed calmness. You can face each day, any new challenge with the question in your heart, “what would love do or what would peace do?” then act from that place. Who knows, it may look and feel a lot different than it used too!
Self-Care Tip:
Quiet Your Mind!
Make time each day for purposeful quieting of the mind. Take 5-10 minutes. Turn off the screen, the radio in the car, the TV. Sit with your feet touching the earth while taking slow deep breaths. Focus on the breath coming into and then leaving your body. Feel the stillness start to wrap around you.
"Calmness is the cradle of power"
-Josiah Gilbert Holland
All my best,
Genna
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